The Kintners Music I’m cool if you don’t want to be friends. But if you never tell me that, how do I know?

I hate changing strings. It wasn’t too bad this time. But, I still hate it..

Give me a clue.

More often than not I am supposed to figure out when folks don’t like me without any clues. It sucks.

They might tell me they like me. Engage me after we haven’t talked a while and say hi. They might even want a jam or a part for their song. They often leave a trail over time that makes me think they don’t like me. But they’ll never say that.

I like knowing what you like. (Even if I don’t like it.)

Folks, one thing about being open that’s nice; folks know what you don’t like. Whether or not you grant me the same courtesy, you know if I like you. To me, that’s valuable information even from folks I don’t like too.

Here is a tune we wrote for a friend in London and his producer. Love how it came out. Our version we sent him is on the bottom of this entry too. Compare if that’s fun!!

You rob yourself.

You let me throw darts in the dark. That’s the dynamic of our relationship. I don’t know what you like or don’t like, so I have to guess. I’ll probably be wrong. It cheats you out of the best me. You’re robbing yourself. You’re not saving me anguish, you’re causing it. Lying and being dishonest always hurts someone. In this case, that’s both of us.

“I’m not into it,” for starting out.

“I’m not into it,” is every bit as valuable information as “I like this.” Do you think I want to torture folks with stuff they don’t like? Are you scared of hurting my feelings? What’s wrong with dialogue about what it is we don’t like about artistic stuff? Why is that a dealbreaker?

I like Gillian Welch and David Rawlings. There’s something “indie” about them I can’t put my finger on. They remind me of me and Keri playing on the couch. Good times.

Dad, and a little mom too!

When I was growing up I was fortunate to have parents who were at least honest with me about what they liked. They showed me what preferences were. They showed me you can grow in them, change them, learn more about them. They’re who we are. If you don’t not like anything, I’m not sure you’re well. That isn’t my issue. I’m pretty open about what I don’t like. I’ve got issues, no lie. But I don’t have that one. Thanks, parents.

What usually happens.

I have this popular online and local friend dynamic where I write folks, you know, *writer. Some of them will never respond except to say, “keep writing me, I like it.”

No.

Look, if you want me to give you my day or thoughts, I’m going to need some in return. As much as I write, I’m a reader first. Not to mention, I feel like a total goober writing to people who never write back. It’s not good for me mentally. It’s a message in a bottle, not a conversation. I don’t really need that. I don’t believe in good spirits or gambling. I just like talking. Listening.

It’s a Recording King Torchlight. I used to have a Martin, nice one. I sold it and kept this, if that tells you anything.

Locals too.

Don’t feel bad, online friends. Locals are just as bad if not worse. Friends will write on social media, which I don’t have because I like my brain. But they don’t see the need to talk one on one. Either they don’t like my personality, or I’m a waste of their time as an individual, instead of thousands in their head. They don’t tell me, so I don’t know! That’s fine! We just can’t be friends, that’s all. Doesn’t have to be mean, but it does require a bit of honesty. I think that’s where the wagon breaks down.

Why can I do it and hardly anyone else can?

I am able to tell folks if I don’t like them or what they’re doing. I’ve discovered this to be a rare ability. It shouldn’t be! We learn in kindergarten everyone is different. We sure don’t grow up that way.

This means I know my friends. I’m not sure folks who ignore me even know me. I’m not sure if they like me or they’re just busy.

One such “friend.”

Had a friend forever who lives close-by who couldn’t afford me 5 minutes in a week, just reading a text. Seriously. He never read anything I wrote to him. And conversations always covered shit I’d already written to him. Sorry, man, work that out, come back and see me. lol. We ain’t friends if you can’t make a minute for me occasionally. You got too much going on, or, you simply don’t like me. Why not tell me that? You like me looking like an idiot liking you? Stroking your ego? How could you possibly like me if I think you do and you don’t? Where’s this going? Can you think on that for 5 minutes, when you get time? I had to figure out by you avoiding me a long time that you didn’t like me. That’s not all my fault. You could have saved us both a ton of effort and embarrassment, being honest.

Also, dishonesty.

People are bullshit too. That person also said he believed in “absolute truth.” He avoids truth like the plague. He’s only into the truth as it suits him. Good riddance. Hope he’s reading, douche. But.. good luck! Haha.

Just say it. A proposal.

If you don’t like me, say it. If you don’t like a song I make, say it. If I get mad, so what? But, I most likely won’t, (anymore). I think your opinions are quite fun even if they’re different. Maybe especially because of it. Look I know your numbers go down if you’re honest on social media so it’s trained you to thumbs up shit you don’t like. Here, let’s be a truth zone. We talk honestly and openly about what stirs us. I love that. No fighting, just celebrating different brains, including our own. How ‘bout it?

I can jam djembe and bass all day, even without a campfire.

The more you like, the less valuable everything you like is. Just our brains🤷.

If we like everything, it feels like my “friends” who say they like me but don’t. But if we can muster not liking stuff, there’s a super power there. All the sudden what we do like becomes special again. Overnight. Can verify.

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