It’s more like looking in a mirror.
One thing I hate about online relationships is that I rarely talk to folks one on one. It’s not a secret of science that folks talk differently in front of a crowd than they do in private. Even I do it, but I’m trying not to, if that counts for anything.
Why I value one on one conversation.
I am a songwriter. The most important thing to me (work wise) is writing good songs. I want introspection and depth. I want substance. One on one conversation is vital for this. Otherwise, folks don’t dress down enough to expose their vulnerabilities. You need those, as many as you can get, to make good songs from multiple angles. It’s a rare treat to get one on one conversation with anyone besides family these days.
When we comment on posts or forums, there’s a performative nature to it. I try to be super dry and informative.. I’m not looking for a long conversation in front of strangers. Maybe I used to be after that, but now I just want to visit. In fact, a goal of my music is visiting. You could say I’m choosing a topic to talk about. Some folks find the performative aspect cozy and safe. I probably have before. But these days, meaning doesn’t require likes and follows. But I do get some meaningful interaction from spending time talking to folks one on one.
“Get off my lawn” unless you want to come inside and visit.
I know I sound “get off my lawn” sometimes but it’s kinda’ on point. I have boundaries. I don’t like folks trotting all over them or always pushing on them. I just don’t like it. I will be happy to talk, but not in front of a crowd when I’m only addressing one person. It’s performing. I get plenty of that other places. Not what I am here for.
Action!
When you talk to your friends on social media, it’s like being on set of a commercial for whoever’s chat you’re using. If folks end up looking at it, it was a good day for Facebook or whatever. I hate all of that. All of it.
You aren’t saving time.
Performing while talking to everyone at once isn’t saving anyone any time. It’s a different action altogether. It’s the difference between skimming the surface or deep dredging. It’s not a substitute one for the other thing like I used to think. It’s actually utilizing different skills. There’s nothing wrong with learning the new stuff, but don’t forget the ole “one on one conversation” for the good stuff.
Return to home
“Collaborations” was released today a few years ago. Enjoying a spin. Join me, if you like. Thanks.
